What Are We Teaching Our Kids?

My daughter has been unhappy at school the past couple of weeks.

Lots of stuff going on.

New school.

New friendship groups.

Different set up.

It’s been a lot to handle for a just turned 7 year old.

It is causing ‘bad’ behaviour at home.

Cheekiness. Rudeness.

The general kick back (I think) that most parents experience.

She has gone from being really confident and enthusiastic about school.

→ To complaining of a sore stomach and not wanting to go to school.

Thankfully that episode is over.

In this situation what do YOU do?

Well we usually call a friend who is also a life coach and she comes into to coach the WHOLE family. It usually starts with us, the parents who should know better. But usually don’t!

What does family coaching do for us?

  • It brings us all together so we realise we are on the same side
  • We look at what is working in the family
  • AND what isn’t working
  • This includes behaviour
  • Communication (the way we speak to each other)
  • Finding better ways of doings things like routines
  • It makes us happier
  • As a family, we get more connected

We also wrote to the school who are responding really positively.

There seems to be a culture of it being ok to be cheeky and answer back.

And EVEN, that this is the revered behaviour.

Is this what we want for our kids?

I don’t.

We also talked to her about the art of NOT taking things personally. My partner had a great analogy by saying if someone throws something at you – she used the image of a frisbee. If you catch it – it’s your’s or on you. But if you don’t want it, how to duck and dive metaphorically so that it doesn’t land on you.

For now. She is happier.

How do YOU hold your children accountable?

I am really curious!

Amanda

 

athomas Parenting